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A Comprehensive
Admissions Essay Help Course (with samples):
Lesson One: Medical
School Essay Question Help
Brought to you by EssayEdge.com
“The world's premier college application essay editing
service” -New York Times
Please
select from the following common medical school topics:
Note: The below essays
were not edited by EssayEdge Editors. They appear as they were initially reviewed
by admissions officers.
Theme
1: Why I Want to Be a Doctor
Many people look back in
time to find the moment of their initial inspiration. Some people have wanted
to be a doctor so long they do not even know what originally inspired them. To
incorporate this theme, look back to the material you gathered in the last chapter,
specifically in response to "The Chronological Method," "Note Major Influences,"
and "Identify Your Goals." Ask yourself these questions: How old was I when
I first wanted to become a doctor? Was there a defining moment? Was there ever
any ambivalence? Was I inspired by a specific person? What kind of doctor do I
want to be and how does that tie into my motivation?
Here are a few of the common
ways that students incorporate this theme:
"I've Always Wanted
to Be a Doctor"
AKA: "I've Wanted to
Be a Doctor Since I Was." and "Everyone Has Always Said I'd Be a Doctor"
This is perhaps the most
common approach of all. The secret to doing it well is to show, not just tell,
why you want to be a doctor. You cannot just say it and expect it to stand on
its own. Take the advice of one admissions officer:
"The "I've always wanted
to be a doctor" essay has been done to death. I think candidates need to be
careful to show that their decision was not only a pre-adolescent one and has
been tested over the years and approached in a mature manner."
Supply believable details
from your life to make your desire real to the reader. One secret to avoiding
the "here we go again" reaction is to be particularly careful with your
first line. Starting with "I've wanted to be a doctor since." makes
the reader cringe. It's an easy line to fall back on, but admissions officers
have read this sentence more times than they care to count; don't add to the
statistic.
"My Parents are Doctors"
This approach to the "why
I want to be a doctor" theme is dangerous for a different reason. Says one
officer:
"It's a prejudice of
mine, but the legacy essay, the one that reads, "My dad and my grandpa and my
great-grandpa were all doctors so I should be too," makes me suspect immaturity.
I envision young people who can't think for themselves or make up their own
minds."
This is not the opinion
of every officer, though. The point is not to avoid admitting that your parent
is an M.D., it is to avoid depending on that as the sole reason for you wanting
to go to medical school. If a parent truly was your inspiration, then describe
exactly why you were inspired.
"My Doctor Changed
My Life!"
AKA: "Being a Patient
Made Me Want to Become a Doctor"
Some people claim to be
motivated to become doctors because they have had personal experience of illness
or disability. Notes an admissions officer:
"I had a student who grew
up with a chronic illness. She spent much time with physicians and other health
care providers throughout her young life. In her essay she wrote about this continuing
experience and how the medical professionals treated her. She wrote of her admiration
of them as well as her understanding that they couldn't yet cure her. Her essay
literally jumped off the page as being unique to her and a compelling understanding
of and testament to her desire to join the people who had been so important to
her life."
If your personal experience
with the medical profession sincerely is your motivation for attending medical
school, then do write about it. The problem is that many students fall back on
this topic even when it does not particularly hold true for them. We cannot stress
enough that you do not have to have a life-defining ability or a dramatic experience
to have an exciting statement. Admissions committees receive piles of accident-
and illness-related essays and the ones that seem insincere stick out like sore
thumbs (pun intended!) and do not reflect well on you as a candidate. Says another
officer:
"My orthodontist changed
my life!" "My dentist gave me my smile back!" These types of themes are
certainly valid, but go beyond that to what particular aspect of the profession
intrigues you. Do you understand how many years of study your orthodontist had
to have in order to reach his level of practice? Have you observed your dentist
for any significant amount of time? Do you know that the profession now is much
different than it was when he or she was starting out? Have you given any thought
to the danger of infectious diseases to all health-care professionals? Present
a well-organized, complete essay dealing with these points."
You may just want to mention
your own experience only briefly toward the end of the essay. Use it as a confirmation
of your decision to be a doctor (instead of as his primary motivation) and demonstrate
that because of the experience you will become a better doctor. Try not to dwell
on the experience and provide plenty of further evidence of your sincere motivation.
"My Mom Had Cancer"
This theme is really just
a variation of "I was a patient myself" and the same advice applies: If
a loved one's battle with illness, trauma, or disability is truly what inspired
your wish to become a doctor, then by all means mention it. But don't dwell
on it, don't overdramatize, and don't let it stand as your sole motivation-show
that you've done your research and you understand the life of a doctor and you
chose it for a variety of reasons.
The Hard-Luck Tale
Some truly outstanding essays
are about strong emotional experiences such as a childhood struggle with disease
or the death of a loved one. Some of these are done so effectively that they are
held up as role models for all essays. Says one officer:
"I had a student who was
considered a weak candidate because of poor grades and low test scores. She was
African-American and although she had pursued all the right avenues (classes,
MCAT, volunteer experiences) to prepare herself for medical school, she remained
undistinguished as a candidate- until, that is, she wrote her essay. The essay
revealed her tremendous and sincere drive. She was from a crime-riddled area of
New York City and several of her siblings had been violently killed. She wrote
about her experience and her desire to practice medicine in the city and improve
the neighborhood where she was raised. It was compelling, believable, and truly
inspiring."
While it is true that these
poignant tales can provide very strong evidence of motivation for medical school,
they are difficult to do well and need to be handled with extreme care and sensitivity.
And, as we have said before, do not rely on the tale itself to carry you through;
you always need to clearly show your motivation. Notes another admissions officer:
"This is going to sound
harsh, but I don't like the tales of woe such as the ones that begin with the
mother's death from cancer. Frankly, I feel manipulated and I don't think
that the personal statement is the proper mode of expression for that kind of
emotion."
The Medical Dichotomy
One of the major draws of
the medical field is its dualistic nature combining hard-core science with the
softer side of helping people. This is described by people in many ways; some
describe it as a dichotomy of science to art; to others it is intellectualism
to humanism, theory to application, research to creativity, or qualitative to
social skills. No matter how you choose to phrase it, if you mention the dichotomy,
then be sure to touch on your qualifications and experience in both areas.
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Theme
2: Why I Am an Exceptional Person
This theme is often tied
in closely with "why I am a qualified person." Be very clear on the difference,
though; the latter focuses specifically on your experience (medical or otherwise)
that qualifies you to be a better medical student, while the former focuses strictly
on you as a person. Committees are always on the lookout for well-rounded candidates.
They want to see that you are interesting, involved, and tied to the community
around you.
To help you think about
how to support this theme, look at your answers to the exercises from the last
chapter and ask yourself: What makes me different? Do I have any special talents
or abilities that might make me more interesting? How will my skills and personality
traits add diversity to the class? What makes me stand out from the crowd? How
will this help me to be a better physician and student?
If you are creative, you'll
be able to take whatever makes you different-even a flaw-and turn it to your advantage.
"One student wrote about
her experience as a childhood "klutz" and how her many accidents kept her
continually seeking medical care. The care she received was the impetus to her
desire to become a doctor and made her essay entertaining, sincere, and eminently
credible."
Note that the candidate
in this example tied her experience to her desire to become a doctor. It is imperative
that this be done with practically every point you make in your essay.
The Talented Among Us
If you are one of a lucky
few who have an outstanding talent or ability, now is no time to hide it. Whether
you are a star athlete, an opera singer, or a violin virtuoso, by all means make
it a focus of your essay.
"These people can be some
of the strongest of candidates. Assuming, always, that they've excelled in
the required preparatory coursework, the other strengths can take them over the
top. Athletes, musicians, and others can make the compelling case of excellence,
achievement, discipline, mastering a subject/talent and leveraging their abilities.
Medical schools are full of these types; they thrive by bringing high achievers
who possess intellectual ability into their realm."
If you do plan to focus
on a strength outside the field of medicine, your challenge becomes one of how
to tie the experience of that ability into your motivation for becoming a doctor.
Students of Diversity
If you are diverse in any
sense of the word-an older applicant, a minority, a foreign applicant, or disabled-use
it to your advantage by showing what your unique background will bring to the
school and to the practice of medicine. Some admissions officers, however, warn
against using minority status as a qualification instead of a quality. If you
fall into this trap, your diversity will work against you.
"If you are a "student
of diversity," then of course, use it. But don't harp on it for it's
own sake or think that being diverse by itself is enough to get you in; that will
only make us feel manipulated and it will show that you didn't know how to
take advantage of a good opportunity."
So just be sure you tie
it in with either your motivation or your argument for why your diversity makes
you a better candidate.
Latecomers and Career
Switchers
You need not be a member
of a minority, a foreign applicant, disabled, or an athlete or musician to be
considered diverse. There are, for example, those who have had experience in or
prepared themselves for totally different fields. If you fall into these categories,
give succinct reasons for wanting to go into medicine and show evidence of sincere
and intensive preparation for your new chosen field.
English Majors and Theater
People
Not everyone who is accepted
to medical school has a hard-core science background. If you're one of these
applicants, you must turn your potential weaknesses into strengths. Point out
that communication is an integral part of being a doctor, and discuss the advantages
of your well-rounded backgrounds. Be very careful to demonstrate your motivation
and qualifications in detail and with solid evidence to offset worries that your
non-science backgrounds may have given you an unrealistic view of a doctor's
life or that you might be unable to cope with the science courses at medical school.
Can I Be Too Well Rounded?
Some people have talents,
abilities, or experience in so many different areas that they risk coming across
as unfocused or undedicated. When handled deftly, though, your many sides can
be brought together, and what could have hurt you becomes instead your greatest
vehicle for setting you apart from the crowd.
Taking Advantage of International
Experience
Many applicants have international
experience. So, while it may not set you apart in a completely unique way, it
is always worthwhile to demonstrate your cross-cultural experience and sensitivity.
To be successful, you must go beyond simply writing about your experiences to
relating them either to your motivation or qualifications. Do not expect the committee
to make these leaps for you; you need to put it in your own words and make the
connections clear.
Religion
Some admissions counselors
advise against the mention of religion altogether. Others say that it can be used
to applicants' advantage by setting them apart and by stressing values and commitment.
This is a sensitive subject area and is best left to individual choice.
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Theme
3: Why I Am a Qualified Person
The last major theme deals
with your experience and qualifications both for attending medical school and
for becoming a good doctor. Having direct hospital or research experience is always
the best evidence you can give. If you have none, then consider what other experience
you have that is related. Have you been a volunteer? Have you tutored English
as a Second Language? Were you a teaching assistant? The rule to follow here is:
If you have done it, use it.
Hospital/Clinical Experience
Direct experience with patients
is probably the best kind to have in your essay. But the important thing to remember
here is that any type or amount of experience you have had should be mentioned,
no matter how insignificant you feel it is.
Research Experience
A word of caution: Do not
focus solely on your research topic; your essay will become impersonal at best
and positively dull at worst. Watch out for overuse of what non-science types
refer to as "medical garble." If it is necessary for the description of
your project, then, of course, you have no choice. But including medical terms
in your essay just because you are able to will not impress anyone.
Unusual Medical Experience
Even if you have not volunteered
X number of hours a week at a clinic or spent a term on a research project, you
might still have medical experience that counts: the time you cared for your sick
grandmother or the day you saved the man at the next table from choking in a restaurant.
It does not even matter if you were unsuccessful (maybe, despite all your valiant
efforts, the man at the next table did not survive), if it was meaningful to you
then it is relevant; in fact, these failed efforts might be even more compelling.
Nonmedical Experience
Your experience does not
even have to be medically related to be relevant. Many successful applicants cite
non-medical volunteer experience as evidence of their willingness to help and
heal the human race.
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For tips on answering general application
questions, click here.
Move on to Lesson Two: Brainstorming a Topic
From
ESSAYS THAT WILL GET YOU INTO COLLEGE,
by Amy Burnham, Daniel Kaufman, and Chris Dowhan. |
Copyright
1998 by Dan Kaufman. Reprinted by arrangement with Barron's Educational
Series, Inc. |
|